He loved us first, He loves us best

If I’m honest, I don’t love God as He truly deserves...

I realized one day that I can’t even really take credit for loving God since He is the source and reason for my love... God is love! And the truth is,

We love because he first loved us.

(1 Jn 4: 19)

Self-sacrificing, unconditional love is against human nature. Yet, this is precisely the love I need to love God with all my heart, all my soul, all my mind, and all my strength. My finite mind cannot wrap itself around the depth of such a love. There are moments when I‘m allowed glimpses of God’s love for me and I’m reduced to tears. And I know that if I understand and accept this love, then I start to grasp who I am as a child of God. Everything flows from this love... I start to love myself, not in a prideful way, but in the way that overrides the lies the enemy has been feeding me over the years. I try to love others, and pray that all will come to know the transforming, healing love of God. And when I’m faced with the people who are hardest to love, I ask God for the strength I need to reflect His love... and no! this is not easy- I do not want to be patient, kind, forgiving, even-tempered, humble or any of the other virtues associated with love... But then, I look at the Cross; at Jesus’s outstretched arms; at the nails and wounds and crown of thorns... and I know I owe Him all of me.